January 7:  The number 

Couldn’t sleep last night.  Work up wanting food and a drink.  I had a cup of tea and 3 teaspoons of peanut butter.

The day before, my food has been a few peanut butter teaspoons (I know, I love it!) and a ham salad with an egg and some veg.  I made my partner a risotto and then also had about 5 heaped teaspoons of that.

So far in 2017, I have yet to have a drink or sugar.  Some carbs in the risotto and one potato, but that’s it.  Also walked close to 17k steps yesterday (about 12k distance).  Yet I weighed 0.4kg more this morning.  All I want to do now is eat and when I go out tonight, drink like a fish.

So I’m thinking if I’d been stronger and not eaten in the night, I might have lost weight.  Nor had anything beyond my meal.  I know I am still low in total over the day but am determined to shed 5kg before I go back to work in 9 days.  As I write that now, I realise that sounds like a stupid plan.  Yet I want to start back at the gym and cannot until I drop back to an overweight but not so I am ashamed to walk on weight.

I wish this didn’t take so much thought space.