January 4:  Walking the path

Back in September, I launched an initiative at work called Steptember.  Any of my staff who wanted to take part was given a pedometer and the challenge was to walk 10000 steps a day.  We got into teams and over 50 of us did it.

I have a Fitbit and was in the middle of an exercise phase.  Would normally have my 10000 allocation by 9am.  I loved seeing my Fitbit show my fit my daily goal.   Yet I took it too far as I was also doing hours of other exercise on top of this.

My Fitbit went back in the drawer after a booze weekend that led to the two month food and alcohol binge over November and December.  However, decided it was time to dust it off and this time simply try and walk 10000 steps for all of Jan.  Just walk.  Not add in HIIT, weight lifting, cardio classes – just walk.  If I’m going to control bingeing – this needs to apply to everything I do including exercise.  Kindness to self and mind.

So this morning I had a beautiful walk with the dogs.  No music, simply watching the sea, sun and absorbing my surroundings.  I felt uncomfortable and fat in my clothes and as it is such a small place, saw people I knew.  But I managed it and it has set up the day nicely.

Fear of judgement controls me.  There are only a few gyms in town and I hate going when big since think they will all be wondering how I got in such bad shape.  But I love walking.  It frees me.  And seeing the dogs play reminds me that simple pleasure can bring great joy.  I’m far from being content yet, but I’m starting to walk down what feels the correct path.